Actually a really good post.
The only way I see it, only go first if you can risk being scammed. Something similar to what you said. If you can’t risk being scammed then use a mm. Pretty simple.
If youre oding a 5m trade and don’t care if you get scammed, it’s whatever if you go first. Just you better not cry if you do get scammed since you lose the right to cry whenever you go first in any trade. The only justificable way I see someone being able to cry about being scammed is if they went first to a trusted, reputable member who ended up scamquitting. Just about every other scenario is on the trader to verify and such.
But regardless of who you’re trading and how long you’ve known them or how trusted they seem, only go first if you can risk being scammed. If this is your last bit of money and you need it to buy something, you better use a MM or end up selling it to a site. Which a MM can scam, it’s a lot less likely than just going first. If someone is offended that you want to use a mm, let them be offended. It’s really not that worth it to rush into a trade and risk being scammed.
By the way, you got scammed like $5k? Rip.